All relationships, family, marriage, platonic, dating, etc., consist of percentages. These percentages fluctuate depending on the situation.It is the goal of most people to have a 50-50 relationship. Give and take.
In average relationships, 60-40 and 70-30 are occasional realities. With and Aspie, however, 80-20 is quite often a reality. Sometimes we need much more than we can give, to no fault of our own of course. Some days, I need to be left alone. Some days, I need to be surrounded by family. Some days, I’m so overwhelmed by whatever it is that’s going on that I find it very hard to act in an adult-like, mature manner. And believe me, it’s just as frustrating to us that we feel like little kids as it is to you that we act like little kids at times. My mom explains it like this: sometimes she needs everyone else to act a certain way to make things easier on me, and sometimes she needs me to STOP and act a certain way to make things easier on everyone else.
Having the mind of an Aspie, I have an easier time seeing things clearly in numbers. Looking at the “statistics” I mentioned earlier, it bothers me that the numbers are so dramatically uneven. There are good days and there are bad days. Because my AS is generally mild, most days are 50-50, but there will be days that will be 60-40, 70-30, or even 80-20. I’m lucky enough to be able to go to bed on those uneven days and know that there are people in my life that love me enough to be that other percent; that 60%, 70%, or even the occasional 80%. I hope that this is the experience of all Aspies, to have people in their life that are willing to go the extra mile for them.